I am excited to share some of the stories from my clients who have birthed with me!

 

 

Jude Kendall Hancock

 

December 7, 2010 at 7:26pm

 

Jude decided it was time to start coming on the morning of December 7^th 2010. It was 8am when labor began and I was exactly 40 weeks plus 3 days. At first I didn’t realize I was in labor. I thought I was just having some digestive upset from something I ate the night before. Until one surge of energy hit me with a bit more force. I was standing in the kitchen with Shon, my husband making breakfast before I took him to work, and I remember telling him, “Honey, I think I might be in labor.” I was actually kind of joking. The contractions were still very mild at this point and felt more like intestinal cramps, very irregular, so I didn’t make a big deal.

We finished getting ready and I took Shon to work and started feeling the cramping sensation more regularly so I told him I might be having a baby today (although I still kind of didn’t believe it was going to happen). Shon said, just call me and let me know if labor progresses so I have some time to wrap things up at work. I dropped him off and started driving to run some errands in town and of course thing immediately started picking up. I decided to start using my contraction timer app to see if this was true labor or just pre labor. I was still doubting at this point that I was truly in labor but the contractions started becoming more regular at 5-7 minutes apart lasting approximately 45-60 seconds. I thought if it was labor, I probably had quite a bit of time so I went to run some my errands around town.

I first stopped at PCC Health Market to pick up some ice chips, sparkling cider and some other things for the birth just incase it was going to happen today. The contractions started becoming more apparent but I could still go about normal activities. After the store I headed over to the bank to close an account and deposit a couple checks. At this point I had to start breathing through contractions and concentrating a bit more while I sat there at the bankers desk…so I thought I should probably head on home. This time I knew for sure I was actually in labor and I was so excited that I was going to meet my baby today. So I went home and at about 10:30 or 11 the contractions were regular and more intense but I could still cope.

After calling my midwife and confirming I was in true labor, I decided to call Shon and my Mom to let them know the baby was coming. During every contraction I found that in order to cope with the strong sensations and hard work, I needed to hang on the corner of the kitchen bar and lean my body way back to relax my hips and I would just breathe through it. I couldn’t go anywhere else during that first part of labor. It was this rhythm and ritual that helped me cope. I even tried to lay down on the couch for a bit in between rushes to conserve energy as I was told was important in early labor. However as soon as I did this lightning bolt of sensation went through my body and I stood up so fast. I started crying… it scared me so much. So I thought, “Ok I am NOT laying down.” at this point I wanted Shon home with me. So I called him and asked him if he would come home…I needed him. Since we only had one car he called my mom to pick him up from work to bring him home. About 30 minutes later they showed up. But my Mom just dropped him off and told us to let her know when I wanted her to be there.

It was about 12:30 at this point and I had resumed my position at the corner of the bar. I was doing ok in my rhythm and zone, still able to cope. However it was getting harder.  I couldn’t even think about accomplishing any tasks. I could still carry on conversations in between easily but didn’t have enough time in between to do any chores or anything. Every 60-90 seconds I had to be right back to my spot for the contraction. For instance, I wanted to shave my legs and bake a birthday cake for Jude I thought I would have time to do this in early labor but it wasn’t going to happen.

As soon as Shon got home my contractions became more intense and I needed to find a new position to cope so I knelt down and draped myself over our couch and stayed here for a long time. As the contractions increased in intensity I draped myself over Shon’s lap as he massaged my back and I remember this being very comforting and helping me a lot. It really helps things along to be nurtured and cared for by someone who loves you.

Since things were progressing quickly my Mom decided to call Char and have her come over. When Char arrived I was still at the couch with Shon. Shon left me for a bit to set up and fill up the tub. Him and Char filled it up with as much hot water as our apartment sized water heater had in it and then they had to boil water and throw it in to make the cold water warm. As things intensified I decided it was probably time to get into another position so I stood up. This intensified labor but I didn’t care cause I knew it was making things progress quickly and I wanted to meet my baby. At this time I found a new position I had to continually come back to and that was hanging on Shon’s neck. I loved this position. It was so intimate and I felt safe and protected. I was also able to draw from his strength, groundedness and calm attitude.

I had to go pee often which I kinda hated because it brought on really strong contractions and since I wasn’t with Shon it was a bit scary. But as soon as I called him he would come over and hold me and then I was fine. Char wanted to check the babies heartbeat so she brought the Doppler over and checked him during one of my contractions which was kinda hard to do because I couldn’t be in the position I wanted to be in. At this point the tub was ready was filled and I asked Char if I could get into the tub. She said emphatically “Yeah!”. She was wondering when I was going to get in but hadn’t been saying much. She let me do my thing. Which I liked. So with Shon by side I went into the bedroom and he helped me undress.

The most intense contraction happened while I was standing up in the bedroom and hung on Shon with all my weight. I could definitely tell the baby was descending and that things were progressing really quickly because it felt like he was pushing on the inside of me with his elbows. At this point it was about 5 or 6 pm and I was probably about 7 cm dilated ( just a guess though because Char never checked me during labor). I got into the tub which felt really nice but I wasn’t really able to relax in there there wasn’t time in between rushes. They started getting closer together and stronger. I was getting scared because it was so intense. I’m sure this was nearing transition. I remember feeling like my whole body was dry heaving. I really didn’t want to throw up for some reason so I was trying not to. Elyzia, my doula and Char’s assistant brought over a cool rag to put on my forehead which was comforting and felt nice. Each contraction was so strong I remember calling for help and praying unceasingly that the baby would come out soon and it would be over. Shon reminded me to look at the items I had set up on my birth alter.

A prentatal picture of Shon and I, Shon holding me in a protective manner and a photo of Christ in the garden of Gethsemane suffering for all men while an angel stood behind him strengthening him. I glanced up at these items that gave me strength and an unseen power. I looked at the fire my mom built and my Christmas decorations and was so thankful that I was giving birth at home in my living room. After the dry heaving and pushing sensations stopped I felt a bulging and and an urge to change to a more upright position to push my baby down. But at this point I was really just breathing my baby down I never pushed really hard except for right after I went through transition and was fully dilated. No one around me knew I was pushing my baby out because I was so quiet and just breathing. I was in a space where I couldn’t articulate what I was experiencing I was aware of people around me but I just thought everyone knew what I was doing and where I was at in my delivery. So I just did my thing. Shon actually thought my contractions had stopped and Char was just waiting for me to start my pushing phase. When in reality I was almost done with my pushing phase.

At this point I’m guessing it was about 7:00. I breathed my baby down and started to feel him crown. I could feel a fold of skin or wrinkly on his head it was amazing. I was a little afraid of what to do to keep from tearing but still couldn’t vocalize what was happening. So I tried not to push while he was crowning but then I had this contraction and urge to push and in one fell swoop the baby popped out and into the water. I fumbled to pick him up but he slipped through my fingers but Shon looked down surprised to see a baby and picked him up out of the water. Char ran over shocked at what she saw and helped Shon bring little baby Jude out of the water and into my arms. She did not expect my 2^nd stage to go that quickly. I think I was just as amazed as they were seeing this little wet shiny body coming out of the water and into my arms. He was so tiny! In fact that was the first thing I said. I was happy and in love with this little person yet felt so inadequate to be his mother. We had the chance to meet our little Jude. Snuggling, hugging, kissing and admiring one another.

Char wanted my placenta to deliver and it wasn’t coming so Shon cut the cord after it had stopped pulsating and Char had me step out of the tub. I was so weak and depleted and so this was quite difficult but I still felt a certain high from the adrenalin and rush of hormones of giving birth naturally. I couldn’t believe it was over. I did it! I gave birth, at home and basically delivered Jude all by myself. That was kind of the exact birth I imagined (minus all the tearing). Char had me get out of the water and go over to the couch. She figured the placenta had detached but was just hanging out so she applied gentle traction to the cord and out came the placenta. She was right it was had detached already and just need a little help. She kept pressing on my uterus to get some clots out which felt weird and was a bit tender. One clot was so huge it filled chars entire hand. It was crazy.

After this I got to have some of my Mom’s yummy chicken noodle soup with whole wheat noodles, which tasted so perfect after doing the hardest thing I had ever done! I was kind of shaky and exhausted and knew I probably needed sustenance. So Char gave me some Chlorophyll drink and some arnica and I snuggled up with my son for a while, while he suckled a bit while studied each other. It was nice to cuddle, but I felt awkward holding him and breastfeeding. This was so new and unfamiliar. I read about how it would be a learning experience for us both but nothing compares to actually being there for the first time. I gave Jude to daddy and Char showed me the two sides of the beautiful organ that fed, loved and protected my sweet baby for the past nine months. I felt so grateful to it. Something she noticed though about him that we didn’t find out in our basic ultrasound is that he only had a two-vessel umbilical cord. Most babies are born with three. I didn’t realize this was even a problem until much later. So I laid down and Char stitched me up which took a long time because I tore pretty bad, but she did a great job and I was as comfortable as one can be in that situation. It was hard though because I just wanted to snuggle with my new little baby and the stitching was taking forever! It must have taken at least 2 or 3 hours. At least Shon and Jude were next to me and Jude got to snuggle skin to skin with Shon for hours.  After Char was done stitching me up, she performed the newborn exam. I couldn’t wait for her to be done so I could snuggle and sleep with my baby boy!

The exam was pretty normal. He had great muscle tone and was strong and absolutely beautiful! However as she neared the end of the exam she checked Jude’s anus and genitalia and found that Jude was born with an imperforate anus. There was no sphincter, no opening, just skin covering his bum. Char told us but I didn’t understand what was going on. I didn’t know what “imperforate” anus meant. Shon paged my Pediatrician office and they called back. They told us to take him to Seattle Children’s hospital. Char said we would have to leave right away and it was 1am! I couldn’t believe it and still didn’t quite understand why we were taking him to a hospital because I thought it would be a very simple procedure…

It wasn’t. We spent 10 days in the hospital with Jude. He had several tests run, much poking and prodding for such a tiny perfect little thing. The first 3-4 days were agonizing! We shed many tears and said many prayers. They ran uncomfortable and invasive tests to make sure there wasn’t anything else abnormal with him. They performed a colostomy surgery so that Jude could get his poop out of his poor little body. It was then 7 days of recovery and making sure Jude was stable. Then they taught us how to change the colostomy bags. I thought I would never get used to it…well I didn’t ever get used to it completely, but we definitely got good at changing his colostomy bags. Sucking liquid poo out of a bag with a syringe was actually quite simple.  However, often times the bag would leak and I would have to change it several times a day which is harder than diapers. It was nice only changing wet diapers for the first 7 months of his life. However it came time when I was really ready to just change poopy diapers. Jude is 9 months old now and done with all three surgeries. They all went really well! He has a fully functioning little body and anus and he is thriving mentally and physically. It has made me appreciate western medicine, hospitals and surgery so much more, and of course God.

During this time so many prayers were answered…

Many miracles wrought…

Many acts of kindness and service performed…

Pure love was shown.

I thank all who helped make this challenge a beautiful experience. It has made us stronger and helped us grow closer to each other and to our Heavenly Father.

I am thankful to be a mother and we are incredibly blessed to have this wonderful being in our midst!

 

Caitlin Hancock